The damage that online social media can do to you is becoming apparent

[baumy300]

Quote: Originally Posted by ODogg

Pimp ****

All I have to say my dude is that it takes a big man with a big set of nuts to speak on what you did, and an even bigger man with an even bigger set of nuts to change it. I'm really glad to hear all of that though, you overcame some demons and are better off for it. I'm glad you're alright. Cheers to you and your family

[steelerfan]

Social media is a cess pool. I've never had a social media account (unless you count YouTube or forums like OS as being under that umbrella, I don't) and I never will. I have no use for it.

It's nothing more than a playground for narcissists (no matter it's intent or how YOU use it, that's what it is). No thanks.

Sent from my SM-G991U using Tapatalk

[ODogg]

Quote: Originally Posted by baumy300

All I have to say my dude is that it takes a big man with a big set of nuts to speak on what you did, and an even bigger man with an even bigger set of nuts to change it. I'm really glad to hear all of that though, you overcame some demons and are better off for it. I'm glad you're alright. Cheers to you and your family

Thank you, minimizing social media (using it for cat videos mostly) has made my anxiety level go from about 90% to virtually nil. I can't state enough how much it has really helped me out!

[ODogg]

Quote: Originally Posted by steelerfan

Social media is a cess pool. I've never had a social media account (unless you count YouTube or forums like OS as being under that umbrella, I don't) and I never will. I have no use for it. It's nothing more than a playground for narcissists (no matter it's intent or how YOU use it, that's what it is). No thanks. Sent from my SM-G991U using Tapatalk

A few years ago I would have looked at you like you were sort of a paranoid nut. Now I look at you like a wise man. Good call, I wish I'd never created an account to start with as well. At least now I know and can limit my usage to, as I said above, mostly just posting cat videos.

[steelerfan]

Quote: Originally Posted by ODogg

A few years ago I would have looked at you like you were sort of a paranoid nut. Now I look at you like a wise man. Good call, I wish I'd never created an account to start with as well. At least now I know and can limit my usage to, as I said above, mostly just posting cat videos.

I completely understand why you would have thought that. The truth is it was never about any level of paranoia but rather it was about disdain for self-promoters mixed with a bit of "I don't care".

I remember when MySpace first got popular. A co-worker showed me her page and all I could think was how crappy it looked and how no one gives a **** what her favorite books are.

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[ODogg]

Quote: Originally Posted by steelerfan

I completely understand why you would have thought that. The truth is it was never about any level of paranoia but rather it was about disdain for self-promoters mixed with a bit of "I don't care". I remember when MySpace first got popular. A co-worker showed me her page and all I could think was how crappy it looked and how no one gives a **** what her favorite books are. Sent from my SM-G991U using Tapatalk

Yeah, see that is what I'm coming to understand about myself. I was a neglected child, I only had one parent that I lived with (my mom) and she was mostly absent in my life as I pretty much had to raise myself.

This is not to lament 'whoah is me' or anything, overall many people have had it far worse, but that is my experience and that experience leads to an adult that wants to put their opinion out there and have people recognize it.

Now that doesn't mean that I need people to AGREE with it, just acknowledge I have a valid opinion. And people don't do that most of the time on social media, why not? Well because they themselves are also doing the same thing.

Basically, in my mind, per what my psychotherapist has said to me, social media is a bunch of people acting as children pointing to something and saying "LOOK AT MY THING, LOOK AT WHAT I DID" and asking for others to simply acknowledge that they are a person.

The problem is, everyone is shouting this at one another and no one is listening to, or giving validation to others.

After I understood this then my desire to post a lot, give opinions, etc has greatly diminished.

Anxiety is created from attempting to get recognition, made worse when you don't get the recognition and then when you're down, depending upon what someone said to you, is like being kicked in the head when you're already on the ground.

That's social media in a nutshell.

[baumy300]

Quote: Originally Posted by ODogg

Thank you, minimizing social media (using it for cat videos mostly) has made my anxiety level go from about 90% to virtually nil. I can't state enough how much it has really helped me out!

Awesome, that's great news. Glad I could help in some way. Listen though man, I know you're not asking for my advice or input, so stop me if I'm being preachy, but just from the little bit that I've read it sounds like the best thing you could do for yourself is stop caring. I mean flat out stop giving a **** what anyone else thinks about you, even your wife sometimes. You already know who you are and what you stand for, and once those core values are established you can not break them for anyone without giving a part of yourself away.

It is so easy to just stop, right now, as you read this, worrying about what other people think of you. Yeah of course your family, wife, some friends, etc... will always matter more than others, but even there you have to set boundaries and maintain who you are. The people who love and care about you will not only get it, but respect you more for it as well. As for people online, who cares. People in public you don't know? Who cares. Live your life, provided you are not hurting someone else, and that's all that matters.

Stand up for yourself as well. If you comment on a cat video somewhere and someone disagrees or gets rude about it just be like "Suck my ****" and let it go. You are as entitled to your opinion and thoughts as much as anyone else, so letting others influence your perception of events or yourself is just squandering your sense of worth.

Obviously not caring can be difficult in some situations, that is a fact, but when you stop caring you realize just how much time you spent worrying about the most trivial **** and worthless opinions and people who have absolutely no bearing on your life, other than the fact you let them bother you.

It really is that simple. All you have to do is nothing. I bet you already know what is worth caring about and fighting for, so all that's left is drowning out everything that isn't. Stand up for yourself bro, I promise it will only lead to better things and no matter what you can always look at yourself in the mirror and know you're a real one.

[Jolly Roger]

I just check out IG for the hot influencer chicks and to laugh at how they all do the same stuff.