Joke Thread

[daflyboys]

B.B. King's wife wanted to give him a special surprise for his birthday, so she thought she'd tattoo his "B.B." initials on her butt.... one "B." on each cheek. He came home from the recording studio later in the day and is greeted by his wife wearing a short négligée. She exclaimed, "I have a surprise for you!", as she turned around and bent over.







King asked her..... "Who's Bob?"

[duckfever8]

Quote: Originally Posted by daflyboys

B.B. King's wife wanted to give him a special surprise for his birthday, so she thought she'd tattoo his "B.B." initials on her butt.... one "B." on each cheek. He came home from the recording studio later in the day and is greeted by his wife wearing a short négligée. She exclaimed, "I have a surprise for you!", as she turned around and bent over. King asked her..... "Who's Bob?"

LOL Wow, that was a great one

[Blzer]

The problem with all of these jokes is I open the page and my eye ends up catching the punch-line before anything else.

[Fresh Tendrils]

Anybody know what the difference is between jelly and jam?

[Rexis]

There once was five year old boy who enjoyed playing with his train set. One afternoon, his mother happened to be standing by the door listening to the boy play. She was shocked when she heard him saying,
"All right, all of you son of a bitches who want to get on the train, get on train. And all of you son of a bitches who want to get off the train, get off the train. And all of you son of a bitches who want to change seats, change seats now 'cause the train's getting ready to leave. Whoo whooooo."
The mother was just devastated, so she scolded her son and said to him,
"Now son, I want to go upstairs and take your nap, and when you get up, you can't play with your train set for two hours."
So the boy took his nap and didn't even mention his train set for two hours. After the two hours were up, the boy asked his mom if he could play with his train set again. She said yes, and asked him if he understood why he was punished. He nodded his head yes, and off he went. The mother stood by door to listen to what her son would say. The boy sat down to his train set and calmly said,
"Whoo whoooooo. All of you ladies and gentlemen who want to get on the train, get on the train. All of you ladies and gentlemen who want to get off the train, get off the train. And all you son of a bitches who are pissed 'cause the train is two hours late, go talk to the bitch in the kitchen.

[chicubsfan20]

Quote: Originally Posted by Fresh Tendrils

Anybody know what the difference is between jelly and jam?

What's the difference?

[Fresh Tendrils]

Quote: Originally Posted by chicubsfan20

What's the difference?

I can't jelly my **** in your sister's mouth.

[daflyboys]

Quote: Originally Posted by Fresh Tendrils

I can't jelly my **** in your sister's mouth.

Sorry....weak.


Now THIS is telling a joke: