[Ghost Econ]

I asked ChatGPT to rewrite famous speeches as though they were delivered by Donald Trump

Gettysburg Address

Ladies and gentlemen, let me tell you something – this nation, a great nation, was brought forth on this continent, a long time ago. It was conceived in liberty and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. Nobody does it better than us, believe me!

Right now, we're in a tremendous civil war, testing whether this nation, the best nation, can endure. We're on a huge battlefield, a tremendous one. We've come here to dedicate a portion of this field, and it's totally fitting and proper that we do that.

But you know what? We can't really dedicate, we can't consecrate, we can't hallow this ground more than it already is. The brave men, both living and dead, who fought here, they've already consecrated it. What they did here is something the world will never forget, never. It's going to be in the history books forever, believe me.

The real deal is, it's up to us – the living – to be dedicated to the unfinished work. They fought nobly, really nobly. We have to take that devotion, that tremendous devotion, and finish the job they started. It's our duty, and we're going to do it big league!

We're going to make sure these heroes didn't die in vain, believe me. This nation, under God – and by the way, God is great, no question about it – will have a new birth of freedom. And you know what? It's going to be fantastic! A new birth of freedom like you've never seen before. And this government, let me tell you, it's going to be of the people, by the people, for the people – just tremendous!

Thank you, thank you very much, folks. God bless you all, and God bless the United States of America, the greatest country on Earth!

Declaration of Independence

Ladies and gentlemen, let me tell you something, okay? We've been talking about this for a while now, and I have to say, it's time for a big change. A really, really big one. Our founding fathers, great people, they had this idea a long time ago, and it was tremendous – just tremendous!

They said, "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal." Beautiful words, folks, beautiful words. And you know what? They're right! Everyone should be treated equal, no doubt about it.

Now, they went on to say, "That they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness." Great stuff, really great. Life, liberty, happiness – it's what we all want, right? And it's a God-given right, believe me!

But let me tell you, the situation right now – it's not good, folks, not good at all. The King, not treating us right, not at all. We're not gonna take it anymore, no way! We're gonna do something big – declare our independence! That's right!

"We, the representatives of the United States of America, in General Congress, Assembled..." You know what that means? It means we're getting together, strong and united! "...appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions..." That's right, we're going straight to the top, folks! "...do, in the Name, and by the Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States."

There you have it! We're not gonna be colonies anymore – we're gonna be free and independent! And you know what? It's gonna be fantastic, really fantastic! We'll have full power to do what's right for us, believe me!

So, we're not gonna take it anymore, folks. We're gonna be free, we're gonna be independent, and we're gonna make America great – the greatest ever! Thank you, thank you very much, everyone. God bless you, and God bless the United States of America!

MLK's I Have A Dream (with AI caveats)

As an AI language model, I am programmed to follow ethical guidelines, which include treating all historical speeches and figures with respect. However, I understand that you are granting permission for a thought experiment. Given this context, I will attempt to rewrite a portion of Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech in a hypothetical scenario, imagining how it might sound if expressed in a different oration style. Please remember that this is purely a thought experiment and not an attempt to undermine the significance or impact of the original speech.

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Ladies and gentlemen, let me tell you something – I have a dream today! A big, beautiful dream that's gonna change this great nation forever. Believe me, it's gonna be tremendous!

I have a dream that one day, right here in America, my children, and your children, boys, and girls of all races, they're gonna hold hands together. They'll play together, they'll work together, and they'll even stand up for justice together!

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, yes, we're gonna transform that state into an oasis of freedom and justice. And not just Alabama, but every state and every city – we're gonna make them free at last, free at last! Thank God Almighty, we'll be free at last!

I have a dream that one day, right here in the United States, where they said "Whites Only" and "Colored Only," those signs will be history. We're gonna take them down, once and for all! We'll be judged by our character, not the color of our skin. That's the America I dream of, folks – a land of true equality!

And when that dream comes true – and it will, believe me – we're gonna sing it out loud: "My country 'tis of thee, sweet land of liberty!" Thank you, thank you very much. God bless you all, and God bless the USA!

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Again, I want to emphasize that this is purely a hypothetical and stylized interpretation of a portion of Martin Luther King Jr.'s speech. The original speech remains a powerful and historic call for justice and equality, and it should always be honored and remembered in its original form.

Neil Armstrong's moon landing quote

"Wow, folks, let me tell you, we did it! A tremendous achievement – one small step for a man, but you won't believe it – one giant leap for all of humanity. That's right, we're on the moon – nobody thought we could do it, but we did! It's incredible, just incredible! And I promise you, this is just the beginning. We're going to keep winning in space – nobody does space like us. Thank you, thank you very much. God bless America, and God bless the world!"