[korme]

Originally Posted by molson

Only works if you can read them in Norm's voice, but these were some of my favorites.

"While in the hospital, Michael Jackson had his room specially decorated with two huge photos of Shirley Temple. But please don’t get the wrong idea, Michael Jackson is a homosexual pedophile."

"The nation is still reeling Thursday’s bombshell announcement that Lisa Marie Presley has filed for divorce from Michael Jackson. According to friends the two were never a good match. She’s more the stay at home type while he’s more of a homosexual pedophile."

"At the Simpson civil trial this week, O.J. Simpson and Fred Goldman got into an explosive shouting match. Mr. Goldman belted at O.J., "don't give me that damn look" and O.J. shouted back "I wasn't even looking at you, you're just mad because I killed your son"

"In a brilliant move during closing arguments, Simpson attorney Johnnie Cochran put on the knit cap prosecutors say O.J. wore the night he committed the murders. Although O.J. may have hurt his case when he suddenly blurted out 'Hey, hey, easy with that, that's my lucky stabbing hat!'"